Searching for the Perfect Query Letter

queryletter2Go Figure: Musings from the Mind of Rob Wilstein

Fellow writers, I am sending out query letters for my novel and was hoping for some feedback from the community on my approach. I’d appreciate any advice as to whether what I have works for you. Thank you in advance for the help. Here’s what I’ve got so far.

Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?

Too impersonal? Should I use the name of each agent? Use title of book?

It took me years to write, will you take a look?

Do they care how long it took? Maybe skip this?

It’s based on a novel by a man named Lear

Will they think I plagiarized? Don’t want to mislead.

And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer

Too wheedling? Do they care that I’m out of work?

Paperback writer

Repetitive?

It’s the dirty story of a dirty man
And his clinging wife doesn’t understand

Too dark? Maybe lighten things up a bit?

His son is working for the Daily Mail
It’s a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer

I like this, but too meta?

Paperback writer, Paperback writer

Again, too repetitive?

It’s a thousand pages, give or take a few
I’ll be writing more in a week or two

Is the length off-putting? Should I let them know it’s unfinished?

I can make it longer if you like the style
I can change it round and I want to be a paperback writer

Too wishy-washy? Maybe I should stick to my guns.

Paperback writer

Cut this?

If you really like it you can have the rights
It could make a million for you overnight

They probably hear this every day. Tone it down some?

If you must return it, you can send it here
But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer

Should maybe stay more positive.

Paperback writer

Paperback writer

Paperback writer, paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer

Definitely too repetitive, right?

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